As we enter the political season I see once again the
spewing of spin. I see statistics in the
form of ratios and percentages floating across the TV screen bringing
irrefutable evidence exposing the stained character of ‘The Opponent’.
It has become mind numbing. I’ve been around the block enough times to
know better than give credibility to these twisted taradiddles. So, in honor of deforming datum I offer these
irrefutable proofs of why the dietary staple of bread is so dangerous.
- More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
- More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
- In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations.
- Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
- Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average American eats more bread than that in one month!
Statistics prove that bread is dangerous. I can’t, in good conscience, vote for a candidate that endorses the consumption of bread.